The Naughty Gang
by Rosemary3107
Summary: How did the Marauders come up with their anomalous names?


**The Naughty Gang**

 **A/N: Hey, guys! We're sorry we couldn't update TYTW this week, but here's a cute little one shot in consolation!**

"Okay, if _any_ of you call me Comet _one_ more time, I swear to Merlin, I _will_ hex you until you can't say your _own_ names again, let alone a weird reindeer's," complained James. The four of them had been sitting around the warm central stove in their dormitory, thinking of nicknames for each other.

15 years old at that time, you'd think a group of good-looking boys would have more interesting things to do. Oh, but didn't they? It was the week after 3 of the 4 best friends had finally successfully transformed into their Animagus forms. James Potter was a tall, brown, handsome stag, Sirius Black was a black, shaggy dog, and Peter Pettigrew was a tiny but fat, brown mouse. They had done so to help their werewolf friend, Remus Lupin during his monthly transformations.

They had wanted to give each other more personal and Animagus-related nicknames. Up until now, all they had come up with were ways to wind James up with reindeer-names.

"If you say so, Cupid!" exclaimed Sirius, snorting in laughter.

"Oh, not again! And not another! How many reindeer can one man need?" James proceeded to bang the back of his head against his bed, against which he was sitting on the floor.

"8, precisely," Remus said, grinning. "Now, can we please get on with what we're supposed to be doing?"

"Yes, please!" Peter squeaked, perhaps his Animagus form did suit him, however much he denied it.

"Okay, then," said Sirius, "how about 'Grin' for Remus? You know, wolf – grin, wolfish grin?" James had stopped banging his head momentarily to stare at Sirius for his ridiculous idea.

"Umm, number 1, _no_ , and number 2, how did you even come up with that?" Remus asked.

"I guess I just have a creative mind," smirked Sirius.

"Or, just an overactive imagination developed due to certain items of clothing, hint: skirts," commented James between two head bangs.

"Jamie, you're just jealous that I get all the girls," Sirius replied, haughtily, knowing that it was a sore subject for him.

"Hey, I can get all the girls in the world if I want. Except for one, who is actually the only one that I want." He had completely halted the hitting streak, wondering if he had lost any brain cells during it.

Remus, knowing that a full-blown row could be coming on soon, intervened, "We're deviating from the topic."

"Right, sorry, Remus, it's not my fault that James is so stricken with Lily that he can't seem to see the other girls, who, by the way, are literally ready to roll out a red carpet just for him," Sirius said.

"Yeah, blame it on the love-struck one, as usual, why don't we?" James replied.

" _Topic,_ guys, we have a _topic_ to discuss here."

"Yes," Peter said, "how about Roscoe for Sirius, seems like a very dog-like name, doesn't it?"

James snorted, "Why don't we just name him Snuffles, then?"

"Excuse me? I am offended; do I _look_ like a Roscoe to you? And even though I think Snuffles is a cool name for a dog, it doesn't deem it fit for all my hairy blackness."

"Wow, he actually considered naming himself Snuffles," whispered Remus to James who was sitting next to him. They both suppressed snickers.

They thought to themselves for another 15 minutes when Peter screamed, "Elvis!" and was answered with 3 distinct and horrified "no's".

Another 5 minutes and Peter went "How about Emmett?" Sirius just made a gagging gesture and Peter slumped back down.

"Ooh, Usstis!"

" _What?"_

"Never mind."

James straightened up, "How about Paws?"

Sirius seemed to like the idea and thought about it. He grinned. "No. Pads?"

Remus smiled at his friends' cleverness. "You got that from padded feet, right?"'

"That's it! Pad – foot!" James said.

"Yeah! I like the sound of that - Sirius 'Padfoot' Black. I think I should change my middle name, get rid of that crazy bat's name," Sirius said. He often called his family members bats or even mats for that matter.

"Alright," Remus said, "1 down, 3 to go."

"I've got an idea," Peter said. The other three stifled groans. "Oh, come on, hear me out at least. So, Remus is a werewolf. And he turns into one at full moon each month. Since the moon is an orb, we can call him Orb!"

"Yeah, way to go, Pete," Sirius scoffed, "We'll call Remus Orb when we're walking down the hallway, or even better, imagine this, 'Hey, Orb, will you please pass the ketchup?' or 'Orb! How have you been?' or 'Orby, could you show me you're Charms' notes?'"

"It's actually not that bad an idea," Remus wondered aloud. He was replied with lost and dumbfounded looks – even Peter was surprised. "Okay, not Orb, but something related to the moon."

"How about Luna?" joked James.

"Or, even better, Eclipse," Sirius commented. He and James broke into fits of ceaseless laughter.

"Think about it," James said between laughs, "'Luna, where are you going?' or 'Eclipse, why are you hiding?'"

Peter gasped in surprise. "Moony," he said. His face was wide with bewilderment like he was amazed at his own intelligence.

"Wow, Pete, that is a good one," Remus said.

"Who would've thought, Peter Pettigrew would come up with something like that?" Sirius joked.

"So it's decided now, Sirius is Padfoot, and Remus is Moony. That leaves us, Peter," James reported.

"Oh, I thought we'd decided on Prancer a long time ago, James," Remus commented.

"Moony!" James whined.

"I like the sound of that name," smiled Remus.

"Yeah, seems kind of nice, doesn't it? But you know, I'm kind of uncertain about Padfoot, don't other animals have padded feet, too? You, know, tigers and such?" Sirius said.

"Yeah, but no one's going to think of a tiger when we say Padfoot, right?" James inquired.

"No, it is quite possible. What if I'm known to be a tiger?"

"I thought you'd like it, seeing as you're already a tiger in the woman's department," Peter piped in.

"Huh, never thought of it that way. I do have a monopoly in the ladies' market, don't I? I mean, have you seen Richards, the Ravenclaw? Woah."

"We're deviating from the _point_ of this late night discussion, _again!_ You know, I'd much rather be sleeping right now if you're going to talk about girls. _"_ Remus interrupted.

"Aww, but Moony, we need your wit!" pouted Sirius.

"Well, then let's get on with this!"

"Peter's turn now," said James.

"Ooh, how about Rabies?" Sirius recommended.

" _No."_

The four entered another long stretch of silence as they all thought of Peter's measly mouse.

"Have you noticed Pete's tiny tail?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, it's kind of like a centipede but much shorter," James said.

"How does Peter's worm of a tail help? I still think Rabies is the answer," Sirius said.

"Peter's worm of a tail," James speculated. "Wormtail!"

"Ooh, I like that," smiled Peter, "it's better than being called Rabies."

Sirius scowled at him, "I resent that."

"It's James's turn now, I think we should really decide on which reindeer, I strongly recommend Prancer," Remus teased.

"I swear to all things magical if you call me Prancer _one more time_ , I will take all your clothes and hide them in places where clothes should not be hidden," hissed James.

"Ooh, I'm so scared," Remus said sardonically.

This was followed by James hitting Remus on the head with a copy of _Hogwarts: A History_ , while Sirius and Peter barked with laughter.

The boys fell silent _again_ , all of them trying to come up with a name.

"James, you're brown right?" Peter questioned.

"Oh, yes, Wormtail, I'm Indian, didn't you know?" James chuckled.

"No, you dolt! You're Animagus is brown right?"

"Yes, the stag is brown."

"So, how about Mud?"

For the second time that night, he was given incredulous looks and Peter quickly piped back down.

"Tiny tail?" Sirius mused.

"No."

"Caribou?" Remus jested.

"No."

"Herbivore?" Peter jeered.

" _No."_

"Ooh, ooh, I know, Antlers!" Sirius piped up.

"Yes, Sirius," James sneered, "call me Antlers."

"Okay, okay no need to get feisty, I was only kidding," Sirius coaxed. He then started rubbing his chin in that weird way that Sherlock Holmes often did. "If you think about it, your antlers look like a tuning fork."

"Do you even know what a tuning fork is?" Remus chimed in.

"Believe it or not, I do." Sirius had a smug grin on his handsome face.

"Actually," started Peter, "your antlers do look like the tines."

"Do you mean the prongs?" questioned Sirius.

"They mean the same thing," Remus said.

"Prongs! That's it! I will be Prongs!" James declared happily.

The others couldn't argue with it and liked their names a lot.

"Now all we need is a collective term for the four of us," Remus theorized.

"The Wanderers!" Peter shouted.

"No."

"The Lost Souls!" Sirius sang.

"Ugh, no way."

"The Vagabonds!" James exclaimed.

"Nope."

"The Mischief Makers!" Peter boomed.

"Nuh-uh."

"The Naughty Gang!" Sirius smirked.

"That is oddly sexual, and _no_."

"The Bandits!" James jeered.

"The Brigands!"

"The Ruffians!"

"Will you people even wait for my rejections?"

"Nope," Sirius jested, "the Marauders!"

"The Freebooters!"

"Wait, what did you say?"

Peter repeated, "The Freebooters!"

"No, you nincompoop, before that!"

"The Brigands!"

"Ugh, Wormtail, I meant what did Padfoot say before you!"

"The Marauders!" Sirius smiled widely.

"That's the one! The Marauders: Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs, shall forever mess around the grounds of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, or at least until they graduate," Remus boomed with pride.

The three Animagi and the werewolf slept not-so-soundly on their dormitory floor that night, each dreaming of the adventures they were sure to have. One glad that he was surrounded by people who didn't care that he was a monster, one just happy to be included, one content that he had finally found a family, and one visualizing the day that four would turn into five and the red-haired, green-eyed girl would finally be his. 

**A/N: We hope you liked it! PLEASE REVIEW!**


End file.
